22 May 2009,
nothing else matter

mood: sick, really really sick.
I cannot find a way to describe it. It's there inside, all I do is hide I wish that it would just go away. What would you do, if you knew. I feel like I am all alone All by myself I need to get around this My words are cold, I don't want them to hurt you. If I show you, I don't think you'd understand, Cause no one understands. i was left alone but i pretend nothing happen i don't want my words to hurt you that's why I'm hiding it away. i thought what i planned could go on but i think its just a waste of time talking and telling about what i feel in the inside. the stars wont come. its a never falling star that i see. my dreams is never true, nothing is going to be true in this world to me. all i wanted is a friend who cares and love me not friends that leave me behind all the time. its OK I'm always at fault, even if its not my fault I'm always the main aim to be blamed. i don't get it, why cant you simply accept my relationship with him. i can see that he is serious in this relationship. friends really don't do this. was it me or things happening around me. i couldn't hold on to this confusion. things is getting from bad to worse.
***
Cause you're everywhere to me And when I close my eyes it's you I see You're everything I know That makes me believe I'm not alone. you lift my feet off the ground and spin me around you make me crazier dear. i couldn't open my eyes at all in the bus i feel so restless all i could do is to close my eyes and hold you tight, don't ever wanna let it go. i sleep so peacefully when you're around. sometimes, i wonder why we are together now not last time. i know that we are together for 1 month but i really hope that you are my Mr right. i really hope that we could last long.I'm sorry to trouble you dear. i really thought i could go for SC but mama asked me to go home and have a rest.